Will My Child Go Through the Same Grief Steps Adults Do?
Children go through the same steps of denial, anger or guilt, bargaining, sadness, and acceptance that adults go through. However, the way they express these stages will look a bit different from how an adult might express them.
For example, a child may show denial by continuing to ask when the pet is coming back home, or looking around the house or the yard for the pet. A young child’s version of guilt may sound like, “My pet wouldn’t have died if I would’ve cleaned my room, right?”
Faced with a situation like this, your best response is to affirm with your child that there is nothing they did to contribute to their pet’s death, and the pet will not be coming back home. Use clear and direct words in talking about death, and use consistency in your explanation: “Fluffy has died, and she won’t be coming back home to us. It wasn’t your fault.”
Learn more about “Explaining Pet Loss to Children at Different Ages,” and “Eight Ways to Help Kids Through the Grieving Process.” Younger children may also appreciate being able to write a letter to the pet who has passed away – just download our one-page template and help them write their answers to the questions on the template.
GRIEF RESOURCES
Your child may experience stress
and depression after the loss of a beloved pet.
Help your child cope with grief by writing a letter expressing their love and favorite memories of the pet.
